Race co-founder Brian Powers' own personal loss moved him to take action, establishing an event that both encourages wellness and raises funds to support the critical treatment, research, and advocacy provided by All Children's Hospital. Brian relates his story through a letter written to his late son.
January 30th, 2010
Son, your mother and I are privileged to have been able to call you our own for the short time that you were with us. You will forever be our little man.
I recall the day your mother and I learned that she was pregnant. In fact, mom was in such a state of shock that she insisted the test was wrong and took another test the following day. Turns out, the first was correct and we were one step closer to realizing our dreams.
Being a naysayer myself, the realization of becoming a father hit me like a ton of bricks when we got to the doctor’s office. Then, as if that wasn’t enough, the doctor pointed out the two blinking dots on the monitor; we were having twins.
We enjoyed a few calm and relatively uneventful days in the passing weeks, but there weren’t many. Your mother and I kept getting reeled back to reality each time we started getting too comfortable with the pregnancy.
Mom and I went to the doctor for our 20-week ultrasound. There we learned we were having both a son and daughter. I left the appointment more energized than I’ve ever been and was off to play a round of golf with your grandfather. Mom, she was headed for the mall with grandma.
Not more than 15 minutes after leaving the doctor’s office, I was racing down the interstate to get to the hospital.
Shortly after getting brought up to speed with what was happening, I received a call… from the hospital. This is odd, I thought to myself, as I’m in the hospital and I’m getting a call from someone at the hospital. It turns out that leaving the car with the valet was more dangerous than me racing down the interstate. The valet company didn’t have too much to say other than they were sorry and that a rental car would be awaiting me downstairs when it was convenient for me to come down. What a start to our hospital stay.
With the exception of the dreadful hospital food, things were going pretty smoothly for the four of us on the fifth floor (antepartum). Mom was catching up on her TV shows and I was faced with fighting off hypothermia each night. You see, mom was on all sorts of medication and as a result, her body temperature was off the charts. Deciding where the Thanksgiving turkey was going to be carved was the biggest decision your mom and I had to make up until that point.
And then, out of nowhere, in the early hours of Thanksgiving morning you and your sister decided it was time. It was at this moment when I first truly began to realize that I couldn’t control everything; no matter how badly I wanted to be in control.
In the delivery room, you and your sister came silently into our lives.
I find myself amazed at how you have been able to shape the lives of those who knew you. You have helped me learn to put others’ needs before my needs and have taught me how much of a gift life truly is.
Thank you Carson for being so strong when your mother and I needed it the most. We were two scared parents with so many more questions than answers, yet you were so full of life with those big blue eyes that were always so eager to take everything in. You must have known your time with us would be so short… why else would you have kept those wonderful eyes open all the time?
More than once I found myself staring into your eyes, losing sight of all the tubes and wires. We shared a few moments together when I forgot we were at the hospital altogether.
Then, as quickly as you arrived… you were gone.
I do not ask why, as I understand that now is not the time for answers – eventually, that day will come.
Your mother and I take great solace knowing that your sister has a guardian angel – a guardian angel with a name. His name is Carson Augustine Powers.